I’ve been recently reading Moral Ambition, by Rutger Bregman. Bregman writes about history, economics, philosophy, and goodness in public life. He’s so passionate about the last that he has formed a foundation to train and support those who wish to have social impact.

Bregman highlights one surprising research finding about altruistic behavior: empathy does not cause us to act. We can be moved by those photos of mass destruction, those news articles about people held without legal recourse, those stories about the impact of drug addiction on kids. But most of us, even those with high moral standards, do nothing.

The primary thing that propels people into action is that someone asks them. Someone says, “Would you please do this?” Or “I need you to do this.” They might even say, “Put your money where your mouth is, buddy.” It doesn’t matter how you are asked. It only matters that you are asked.

In occupied Holland, 96% of the people who sheltered Jews from Nazis did so because someone asked them. It wasn’t about politics, religion, beliefs, or feelings. It was because someone asked.

I will admit right here that I hate to ask people to do things. I don’t want to cause them discomfort. I don’t want to put them on the spot. I don’t want to cause ME discomfort by making them feel awkward. 

But then I think back to the times that someone asked me to do something. Often it was no big deal. When it was a big deal, it made me feel included in something important. Being asked—and then given the opportunity to act—caused me to know that I was having impact in a place where I had previously felt powerless. Asking each other to help is a powerful way to build community.

Are you aware of hunger in our villages? Organize your friends and neighbors to contribute to our food banks; ask them to fill that box at the grocery store, take dinner to someone. Are you aware of the needs of our kids? Ask friends to become classroom volunteers, to babysit for single parents, to mentor teens. Are you aware of what it will take to keep the newspaper afloat? Invite those who are able to make a no-strings donation. Are you worried about our seniors? The health of our environment? Figure out what you can do and ask your friends to join you in the work.

 I am asking you to reach out and do something, even more than you’re doing now. I am asking you to help not only those who are in need but also those who could give. This is moral ambition. We don’t simply assist on a one-on-one basis; we change the nature of our communities. When we ask each other to help, we take aim at the root of the problem, not just the obvious issue.

Those old drug advertisements told us, “Just say no.” Here’s a better slogan for our life together: “Just ask.” And if you’re asked? Just say yes.